ARIES: Yes Ruth, I think I can. We looked at a polite way of speaking to an older person, someone we wanted to respect. 'Would you mind if I left your lecture five minutes earlier to catch the train?'

RUTH: Yes, that's right. We also looked at two other ways of asking permission politely. They were, 'Do you mind if...?' and 'Is it alright if...?' In the drama we heard Jim and Grace arguing about Grace's bike. Listen to how she answers him.

Conversation

RUTH: Aries, did you hear her reply?

ARIES: Yes, she said, 'I think I'll say no.'

RUTH: In speaking English politely, we don't just say 'no'. We can say, 'No, please don't.' Or Grace could have said, "No, I don't want you to use my bike." Talking to her brother, Grace was able to talk like that. If she was talking to a friend, it would be a lot more polite to say. 'I'd rather you didn't use my bike.' Aries, say that sentence after me. 'I'd rather you didn't use my bike.'

ARIES: 'I'd rather you didn't use my bike.'

RUTH: In a classroom, a student might ask, 'May I smoke in the classroom?' Your answer might be, 'No, please don't. It makes my eyes sore.' Say the answer again with Aries after me. 'No, please don't. It makes my eyes sore.'

ARIES: 'No, please don't. It makes my eyes sore.'

RUTH: You can also say, 'I'd rather you didn't.' In answering the question fully, I'd say, 'I'd rather you didn't because we can't open the windows to let the smoke out.' Aries, can you think of a sentence using 'I'd rather you didn't...'

ARIES: 'I'd rather you didn't eat my sweets.'

RUTH: There is one other way of politely refusing permission and that is by saying, 'That's not a very good idea...' Let me put that in a sentence. 'That's not a very good idea as my bike is broken.' Aries, say that sentence after me. 'That's not a very good idea as my bike is broken.'

ARIES: 'That's not a very good idea as my bike is broken.'

RUTH: We'll repeat these three ways of refusing politely again at the end of the programme.

RUTH: In our true story today, Christopher is reading about a man who lives in Uruguay, one of the countries of South America. The person isn't named. This is because the man committed a murder, and was sent to prison. Even in the desperate state of his life, by listening to the radio, he heard about the love of the living God. This love is able to reach anyone, anywhere.

Story Testimony

'Coming home from work, I called to my wife as I came through the door. 'I'm here, I'm home'. There was no reply. I called to my wife again, but again had no reply. There was nobody in the house. I knew instantly where she had gone.

My wife had told me that she was in love with another man, so I'd forbidden her from seeing him again. Coming home to this empty house, I realized that she had gone - left me for another man. My anger rose, my temper took control. I picked up a knife as I ran through my house. I was determined to kill my wife and her lover. I broke down the door of his house in my rage. I ran around looking for them. When I found them, I knifed first my wife and then her lover. Once they were dead, I killed my children also as they slept. I then began to cut myself. I also wanted to die. But a neighbor had alerted the police and as I lay wounded, they arrived. I was taken to hospital.

When I was well enough, I was taken before a judge. 'You'll go to prison for the rest of your life for what you did to your wife and family'. I knew his judgment was fair. I deserved the punishment I'd been given.

I spend a lot of my time in prison listening to the radio. One day, I heard some singing and as I listened, I heard a message about changing - changing from bad to good, putting the wrong things in your life right. The speaker told of the person 'Jesus Christ', and how as God's only Son, he had come to this earth to die for my sins. That was so wonderful to hear. My sins were great, but I knew God would forgive me. I wrote to that radio station and told them that by listening to their programmes, I'd found a new meaning to my broken world.

RUTH: It's hard to believe that even when lives are completely broken and there seems no future, the living God can open a way.

RUTH: I promised we'll finish our programme today with more practice on polite ways of refusing permission. I'll say them first, and then why don't you say them again after me with Aries? 'No, please don't it. It hurts my eyes.'

ARIES: 'No, please don't. It hurts my eyes.'

RUTH: 'I'd rather you didn't.'

ARIES: 'I'd rather you didn't.'

RUTH: 'That's not a very good idea.'

ARIES: 'That's not a very good idea.'

RUTH: Refusing to give permission to someone should always be spoken politely. We don't have to give permission to people if we don't want to. Aries, can you think of somewhere you could use these answers we've practiced today?

ARIES: At university, I am often asked by my friends if they can borrow my lecture note. I don't mind doing it if they missed the lecture because of illness. They need to catch up on what they missed. But I'm sad if they come not prepared to work and then asked to borrow my pens. I had even been asked to lend money to my friends. I don't like to say 'no' to my friends but sometimes I have to. I might want to look at my lecture notes again or I might not have the money to lend my friends.

RUTH: Next week on 'Say it Again', we are looking at ways of disagreeing with friends. I enjoy hearing other people's ideas and I must admit I enjoy talking with my friends. When we all disagree, they can be good arguments. Next week, Grace and her brother Jim are enjoying disagreeing about football. I hope you'll join Aries and me then. So for now...